Picture this: You’re feeling down. You’ve had a long day and all you want to do right now is collapse on the couch and spend hours disappearing into the comfort of your favorite TV show. Hours speed by until you switch to your phone, trading TV for doom scrolling. By the time you start getting ready for bed, you feel even worse than you did earlier in the day.
What can you do differently?
acting opposite: 4 steps to implement this dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) practice
A core skill taught in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is opposite action, a technique designed to help with emotional regulation by intentionally acting opposite to the emotional urge that is being experienced. An emotional urge may look like, for example, wanting to withdraw when feeling down or depressed. Opposite action would challenge you to instead do the opposite of that urge: Seek support/connection!
Opposite Action can be implemented with 4 main steps:
Identify the Emotion
Begin by identifying what emotion you’re feeling.
Notice the Urge
Pay attention to what your emotional state is urging you to do. Are you feeling like you need to withdraw? Avoid something? Yell? Recognizing the urge is a crucial step in the process.
Identify the Opposite Action
Once you understand the emotion and its accompanying urge, think about the opposite action that would be more helpful than your emotional instinct. For example, if you’re angry and want to yell, the opposite action could look like taking a few deep breaths and calmly discussing the issue.
Practice the Opposite Action
The final step is to actively choose to engage in the opposite behavior. It may feel uncomfortable or unnatural at first, but over time it will help rewire your emotional responses.
how does the dBT strategy of Acting Opposite Help?
Opposite action can be a particularly helpful coping skill to use in situations where the emotion you are experiencing is disproportionate to the situation or when your emotional impulse is harmful or unproductive. Some other benefits of opposite action include:
Decreasing emotional intensity
Acting opposite to the emotional urge can prevent the emotion from escalating.
Improving relationships
Acting with thoughtfulness rather than reacting impulsively can improve communication and reduce conflict in relationships.
Increasing emotional resilience
Repeatedly practicing opposite action helps individuals develop greater emotional flexibility and resilience.
Opposite action can be a powerful tool for anyone looking to improve emotional regulation and reduce the negative impact of intense emotions on their behavior and relationships. By consciously choosing to act in ways that are opposite to emotional impulses, individuals can break the cycle of emotional reactivity and foster healthier responses to life’s challenges. While it may feel uncomfortable at first, with practice, opposite action can become a natural and effective way to manage emotions and build resilience.
If you’re working on managing your emotions or learning DBT skills, opposite action is a technique worth incorporating into your toolkit. Remember, small changes in behavior can lead to big improvements in emotional well-being.
Meet The Author
MAEYSON NOVELO
MS, LAC
Meet The Author
Maeyson is a Clinical Therapist at Sea Glass Mental Health. She works with adults, teens, and couples and specializes in anxiety, depression, stress, trauma, life changes, and coping skills.
